Bullies in School (They’re Bad)
Mr. Teachbad is taking the unusual step of inviting a guest blogger to do the work today. It is also a bit of a departure in that the sole purpose with this one is to be helpful.
It’s an article by Patrick Del Rosario about addressing the problem of bullying in schools. At the end I have added my own comments about LGBT bullying.
Dealing with a Bully Student: What to Do, How to Cope
by Patrick Del Rosario
Every class has at least one bully, or shall we say at least one potential bully. How far the bully is able to go in antagonizing and controlling those he or she perceives as being weaker depends a lot on how quickly and consistently the teacher is able to respond to the situation.
Statistics show that over 30% of students report that they are or have been bullied at school. As a result of bullying, these students are more likely to become involved in physical fights at school and suffer from depression and other mental health problems. Research has also shown that schools where more bullying is reported also tend to score lower on standardized assessments. Clearly, bullying is a serious problem and can negatively affect those involved, but as an educator, you are probably all too aware of this fact.
A study carried out by the NEA and Johns Hopkins University found that 98% of teachers considered it “their job” to deal with bullying at school. Unfortunately, though, only about 54% of these teachers had received training on bullying prevention. The lack of sufficient training often means that bullying at school is not addressed as effectively as it could be, and additionally, it may not even be recognized as bullying in some cases.
So how do you tackle bullying in the classroom and provide your students with the safe and supportive learning environment that they need in order to succeed? Here are a few tips:
Learn to recognize bullying in all its forms
Bullying comes in many different forms and while most people assume bullying refers to physical abuse, this is not always the case. It can be defined as any behavior that is deliberately hurtful and repeated.
There is physical bullying such as hitting, kicking and intimidating others and there is verbal bullying such as name-calling, racist remarks or other verbal abuse. Bullying can also be indirect and target people emotionally. An example of this type of bullying could be excluding one person from a group or spreading harmful stories about someone to damage their reputation.
Typically, bullies want to be the center of attention in a group and will attempt to establish their power by testing the responses of those they perceive to be weaker than they are. This will usually start out in small ways as the bully tries to test the waters and see if the student will complain or fight back and whether or not the teachers will intervene.
It is important to stay alert and watch for the little indications so that you can take action before the situation escalates. If the bully is shown early on that his or her behavior will not be tolerated and that there are clear consequences for such behavior, they will be less likely to continue.
Don’t rely on the victims to let you know what is going on as these are often children with low self -esteem and a lack of confidence who are desperate to fit in with the group. It is unlikely that they will seek help as they tend to blame themselves and believe that the bullying is their own fault.
Work with others to tackle the problem
If you have identified a bullying problem in your class or school, don’t assume that one chat with the bully will put an end to it. Even if you no longer see it happening in your classroom, there is a big chance that the bullying is continuing elsewhere or in other more subtle ways.
Familiarize yourself with your school and district policies on bullying and think about how you can implement them in your situation. By getting help from the children’s parents, your colleagues, principal and other students, you will be better able to monitor the situation. If more people are aware of the situation it will be easier to contain.
It is also important to speak to the bully’s parents, both to alert them of the situation and to get a feel for the bully’s home situation. Bullies are often children who come from troubling situations at home where they feel helpless. As a result, these children often resort to bullying weaker children to gain a sense of power and control. Once you understand where the bully is coming from, it may be easier for you to take appropriate action and control the situation.
Helping other students to be aware of bullying and the serious consequences it can have is also a good step to take. You could conduct classroom activities around bullying, such as reading books, viewing movies and educational programs and having open discussions about how such situations could be resolved and/or avoided.
Get the victimized student professional help if necessary
Peer bullying can have devastating long-term effects on the victim, both on their academic achievements and their mental health. If a severe bullying problem has continued for a long time and a student appears to be emotionally or psychologically distressed, it is important to seek out appropriate support for them in the way of a school psychologist or counselor. A child psychologist will be better able to assess the situation and recommend an appropriate course of action.
Victims that have low self-esteem and are withdrawn and isolated from the group can also benefit from confidence building programs, either at school with the group or in a different environment.
Patrick Del Rosario works for Open Learning Australia. When not working, Patrick enjoys blogging about career and business. Patrick is also a photography enthusiast and is currently running a photography studio in the Philippines. If you have a blog and would like free content you can find him on online or email him at Patrick (at) oc.edu.au.
Teachbad Commentary
Last week I stumbled upon a Facebook debate about an anti-gay marriage ballot measure in Minnesota. A young college-aged lesbian woman had defended the rights of gays to marry on her aunt’s post supporting the anti-gay marriage measure. In response to the young woman’s rather well-reasoned arguments for legal equality, she was met with this (from much older adults and at least one family member):
Why wasn’t there 2 women or 2 men created at the beginning of time to replenish the earth?…the Creator had a plan and knew what was needed, a man and a woman….where does it stop? Does it stop at being gay? How about the person who loves his dog? Should he be allowed to marry the dog?
We need to speak through God’s words. If you make gay marriages legal, then you need to include marriage to minors, animals, and multiple partners…
Does God create some people to like little children? I am just wondering where the line is on how we are created? Or is it us creating ourselves how we want to be or what makes us feel good?
Spending a lot of time in “church” cannot justify knowing what sin is or is not…share with me where in God’s word it says being gay is ok.
God has certain rules – I am doing my best to go by God’s rules and he’s very clear on the issue of homosexuality.…There are consequences.
I Know several gay/lesbians couples! They are sweet, knowlgeable, and fun to hang out with. I do not judge you or anyone else, that’s God’s job. I love you as my niece and will never stop….It is your choice to be defensive here tonight.….God wants us to be happy while living under His statutes once we become his spiritual children. (Not everyone is His Spiritual Child.)
This is, broadly speaking, the love the sinner, hate the sin approach of fundamentalist Christianity. Or, as I like to call it, the Jesus is making me be an asshole switcheroo.
I guess my point is that these people are raising kids who will think of their LGBT classmates as frightening, threatening and fundamentally just wrong. And some of them will feel good if they can push around the gay kid.
Given the high rates of suicide and depression among LGBT youth, the Holy Ones might want to lay off. If you don’t have anything nice to say, shut the fuck up.
Mr. Teachbad
ps – Good luck to all my homies on the east coast getting ready for Sandy Frankenstorm.
I’m one of the relatively lucky ones. I didn’t get bullied in elementary school, junior high, or high school. I only experienced mild hazing during my freshman year of college on the night that upperclassmen hazed the freshmen.
My first year of Hebrew School (while I was in third grade in elementary school), though, was another story! I didn’t know any of the students in my Hebrew School class as they went to a different elementary school from the one I did. I was the only one who wore glasses, so I was getting called “Four Eyes” during Saturday Junior Congregation by two of the boys from my Hebrew School class. They sat behind me, used to kick my chair, and also put their feet through the space between the wooden folding chair bottom and the back, so that they could kick me directly.
We had a strict Hebrew School teacher, so nothing happened while the class was in progress, but afterward, while in the hallway, putting our jackets on, they would call me “Four Eyes” and shove me around. So, one day, after one of them called me “Four Eyes,” and had pushed me, I walked away, turned to face him, took a running head start, and jumped right into him, with outstretched arms hitting his chest, propelling him a couple of feet backward into the wall. He was quite startled and said, “Why did you do that?” I said, “Cause you’re an asshole!”
From that day on, there wasn’t any problem with the two of them either at Hebrew School or at Junior Congregation.
What job does the one that I knocked into the wall have today? He’s a guidance counselor at an intermediate school in the city where I live.
I lost track of his friend, but would be curious to know whatever became of him.
I think this article is excellent – as far as it goes. But there is a huge danger that with all this national anti-bullying rhetoric and reaction, we are entering yet another failed zero-tolerance policy situation.
“If the bully is shown early on that his or her behavior will not be tolerated and that there are clear consequences for such behavior, they will be less likely to continue.”
Unfortunately, this just isn’t very true. Punishment rarely works for ANY situation – in the longterm. Oh, it lets us feel virtuous when we they “stop” the bullying; that is, when the damaged kids we call bullies learn to mask their actions so we can’t see them. Sure. But bullying WILL continue because these kids are hurt.
Almost all bullies are victims, too. Kids DO NOT naturally arise in the morning WANTING to do harm. (I also believe there is no such think as laziness – SOMETHING creates the inertia that inhabits homo sapiens who are naturally vigorous workers, but that’s another issue.)
If their situations are not addressed at their cores, these kids and their behaviors will simply go underground and resurface later, when they feel powerful again, or when they feel they won’t get retribution. And when, as a society, we are least able to turn them around. As adults, they will bully at work, in their social lives, in the military (how many end up there!?!), at home, and on and on. We know them. Don’t we wish their issues (dysfunctional homes, terrible messaging from authorities in their lives, trauma, etc.) had been addressed when “we” as a society, through structures like schools and churches and social agencies could have had an influence? When it was far lest costly to take care of things?
We are doing FAR TOO LITTLE to address bullies-as-victims. We all should be choosing to work with them – and the circumstances that create them – in early intervention and by other means. Instead, we marginalize and punish them. Show me ANY time this practice has been beneficial to society??
Caroline,thank you for your comments. Teachers can subscribe to “Teaching Tolerence,” for free. It is a wonderful magazine to read thoughtful articles that may help them. http://www.tolerence.org. “A place for educators to find thought-provoking news, conversation and support for those who care about diversity, equal opportunities and respect for differences.” Another book that is as important today as it was years ago is,”To Make a Difference: Teaching in the Inner City.” by Larry Cuban (The Free Press-Macmillan)Larry is a well known professor in the Education Department at Stanford and Mr. Teachbad has read and been interested in Larry’s books. I recall some Sundays when I prayed for snow so school would be cancelled on Monday…never thought of a hurricane, but it does sound as if some teachers will have a day off on Monday or longer.
Thank you.
I feel Bullied . You just did what the politically correct do when they disagree.. Don’t you think. Who would dare disagree? You would be labeled a bigot for disagreeing. Right? For off, they argument you referenced took place outside of the classroom. Secondly, marriage has been defined as a union of one man and one woman always. Now the topic is up for debate for the first time and people are offended because there are those who would dare to engage in the debate. It just naked them fundalmentalist dicks? Why? Because the newly liberated feel they have a monopoly on correctness and the moral high ground? Some might believe that watering down the definition of marriage is not okay and that the term ‘civil union’ would be a better idea. But, you aren’t allowed to express this because you might be bullied by those who use name calling and insults to promote their own agendas of what is fair and right. Staking out the moral high ground may be a good strategy but it doesn’t truly address the new issue on the table. Incidentally, this issue was placed on the table not by those who are against gays, but by the gays themselves. Yet, the very idea that some may not be in favor and are entitled to voice their reasons is under assault?
P.s Kids will always be kids. This is just one more undeniable fact. Yes, teachers have always been supposed to ‘address’ bad behavior. This blog seems to have focused on how impossible it is now to do just this.
Also. Let ‘em marry. Why shouldn’t they be an miserable as the rest of us?
Being my non-politically correct self, I will simply say…bullying is a part of life. Like the hurricane which is getting ready to hit us here in NY like a ton of bricks, it’s part of nature. It’s not nice, we all wish it didn’t exist, but it is part of life.
It’s like part of life wish teaches us a simple lesson: Life can be rough. In fact, it can be a b*tch. I was bullied by my principal. I responded as best I could. I didn’t like it, but that’s life. IT’S HOW WE RESPOND TO IT AND HOW WE LEARN FROM IT. That’s all I have to say on the matter.
I’ve been bullied by my principal too. I left the profession.
Lots of taxpayer dollars spent on Bullying programs now. My two teens say it doesn’t make a difference. They’ve had classes in it since they were 5! Kids still bully, kids still feel bad. I teach my kids to be strong and respect others, believe in their talents and use them to produce good work. If they’re bullied then we have to problem solve the situation. Gay Straight doesn’t matter, certain individuals just seem to draw attention one way or the other. Me I’m a blob magnet! Consider the source, let it go. My mother always taught me to ignore, and for the most part that actually did work. PC and Tolerance will result in the ruin of the USA. I’m quite sick of the bullying bullshit.
Uh, did I fall asleep and wake up in a bizarre dream in which my favorite (and only, but that’s a compliment) blogger, Mr. Teachbad-Ass teamed up with Judith Claire and turned into one of my dreaded Tuesday PD sessions?
Wake up, and keep repeating, “It’s only a dream, it’s only a dream, it’s only a dream.”
Teach22: I wish I wrote that. What the f? I can’t control most problem behaviors. Wouldn’t it be nice if the useless crap parents who don’t even teach their kids basic manners stopped being politically incorrect assholes too? Is this my favorite blog ?
MTB : would you at least substitute for a couple days– pu leese! What I think doesn’t matter in the first place and I’d be lucky to teach enough manners that my students don’t try to beat the crap out of each other every other period.
Kum ba ya
Maybe the Bullying problem originates a little bit further up the chain. The tone set in schools by so called reform is a form of bullying on the local school community. Don’t think the kids don’t pick up on how helpless thier teachers have become in the face of all the threats and insanity which has extended into their lives in the form of insane practices like non stop testing. The lesson we are teaching here is that problems can be solved by threats and external sticks and rotten carrots. Why should we be surprised when they act on what we are teaching them? On the other hand I believe it is important to move beyond the attitude that kids will be kids. I had a wonderful guidance counselor to work with on the bullies in my class and we worked with groups of students bringing in the victims as they were able to participate. It does help to be proactive. And I did see GBLT kids consistently bullied so it is important to address that problem as well and kids do pick up on the attitudes of the adults in their lives including their teachers. Also often bullies are often abused at home in some way and again they are learning from what adults do. That teachers should be aware and proactive are good ideas.
I keep my room open during lunch so kids that need a safe space/a cool down space have a place to go. I have (unfortunately) started to believe that adults are completely helpless when it comes to bullying. The kid that will speak up and try to stop the bullying will end up being bullied even worse. That’s why more kids don’t speak up. And geez, watching the principal bully the staff surely gives kids a distorted sense of right/wrong, don’t you think?
OK…I think it’s fair to say that the Teachbad crowd did not fully embrace this post. It was a calculated risk. But the problem of bullying is maybe the one, of all the things that at different times my administrators have told me is important, that I feel strongly about. I know we can’t fix it. But even the laziest jackass kid in your class should not feel threatened or be systematically, repeatedly singled out for abuse and intimidation by his peers. And I think you know that I haven’t turned into a PC wuss who thinks that PD can solve anything. PD is strictly to cover people’s asses and create the appearance of solving problems. I’m all for kids getting punched every now and then if they deserve it and this whole country needs to toughen up a whole lot in general.
But something about bullying really strikes a chord with me. The social-psychological power dynamics of school are pretty unforgiving. Thankfully, we grow out of this. To be honest, I think this is a bit of exorcising my own guilt because I could be a bully in high school. I used my rapier wit to make easy targets miserable and I feel bad. I’m sure there are at least a half dozen or more 40 year-olds now or whom high school was miserable partly because of me.
My younger readers may not have seen The Breakfast Club http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0088847/. You should watch it.
And let’s all just try to be nice.
I don’t mind a break from the teaching sucks fest andthe attempt to tackle a hot button issue. Moreso I appreciate the confession at the core of this post, your own guilt. That was the real post….no guess blogger needed
On the subject of pop culture representations of bullying, I recently picked up a copy of Stephen King’s Carrie. In his introduction he confesses to writing Carrie out of a sort of haunting guilt is his own from high school experience in which he was the silent observer of two girls being bullied o.n separate occasions. One ultimately committed suicide. So his fiction iis a means to excorcise real guilt.
Isn’t there a new Carrie movie coming out?
The social-psychological power dynamics of school are pretty unforgiving. Thankfully, we grow out of this.
Do we really? I’m not so sure. History is littered stories of bullies and oppression. Even the most cursory exam of today’s news will tell the same tale.
Bullying is a modern expression of the survival instinct; it isn’t going away no matter how much adults wish it would. Learning how to deal with it is part of growing up.
No one ever said living life was easy. As much as we try to avoid unpleasant experiences like bullying, we will all have them. It is how we handle terrible mistakes and awful situations that truly makes us human and civilized.
I do appreciate the bullying blog post and I agree with many of the comments on both sides of the issue. But there is an even greater bully knocking on our American door at this time and the problems are only going to get worse in the future. kmlisle is right, starts from the top down when there is no support for the teachers. Take a look at that new Obama ad using children to sing out against his opponent. Read that again, adult machine using children. Our society is heading in a dangerous direction when children are being used in the propaganda/political machine!! I know they always have but that never makes it right. As I study for yet another frick’n Praxis exam I have been starkly reminded of the Nazi history!
Thank you for posting the material, and thank you to everyone who commented. So many serious issues facing teachers today! When the hell is there time to really ‘teach’?
Let’s fix some of the problems facing teachers: Until our educational system stops operating like a dysfunctional family, nothing will ever be right. Even the kids know the truth and they have told me that they know that their teachers are scared and bullied. They know the adults are rarely a significant resource that has enough power to actually help them with problems like bullying. They know!!. Obviously, most decent teachers stop bullying when then can. I do — when I can. When a teacher is so harried with multiple levels of problems, tasks, situational dilemmas as to be incapacitated on many fronts, everything about how school should operate suffers. Also, when I learn that my pink slips are filed in the trash can, what message does this send to the aggrieved parties of a class room brawl? We are liars now. We say zero tolerance when what the school means is that we are to pretend the problem isn’t there, so it won’t affect the number of suspension days used etc. Again, it feels like it is the teachers who are supposed to do the fixing. I could fix a lot more problems if I had the power to punish the kids who needs to be punished.